Happy Thanksgiving everyone

Things I am thankful for:
my two precious angels sleeping upstairs

my wonderful friends and family

the fact that I did well in the inlaw department, not like some people I know that have a really hard time with theirs

the good health of me and most of my friends and family

the roof over our heads

the fact that we live ok, we don't have alot but we are not starving either

the praise and appreciation and not sure how to put this... ok, got it, the inlaws being proud of me for my cooking of the turkey, stuffing and potatoes (they are wonderful cooks)


Things I am not thankful for:
The fact that I am not with my family on this day because my mom and my sister live out of state and I am too tired to argue with dh about it because he wants to see his family (we have a standing invitation to my cousin's but we started doing it when we got married as not to split the day between different houses, it evolved to the inlaws, bil, dh's grandpa, and dh's aunt and cousins)I love dh's family and enjoy spending time with them and it is nice to have the holiday here where the munckins can go go bed in their own room when they need to. It would just be nice to be appreciated and not be given a hard time about everything that I ask for helpwise (from dh, NOT his family, they were great).

The fact that I have not spoken to my mom in over a week because she is a very selfish woman and since I was pregnant I refuse to deal with it the way I used to and she does not see it at all. This happened also over Yom Kippur and I caved in and called her and she was not nice, so this time I didn't and neither did she. My dad passed when I was 14 and she is all I have and out of everyone in my life, I feel the least supported by her. This hurts me so bad that I cannot even tell you.

***sorry this is turning into a mini-vent****

The sadness and lonely feeling that I have today and pretty much always due to the above and a husband that never seems to want to spend time with me or his family, he only does when he has to because I need to take care of something else. He is too busy "working". To give him credit he did do well today when I was busy cooking and hosting, he cared for the babies and did a few things that I asked when they were napping but again it was not without argument and him being very annoying. BUT don't you know, that supporting a family and working a paying job is all that a man needs to do to make things 50/50? Oh and sorry if tmi, he thinks that showing me that he loves me is hanging on me and wanting sex especially right after he is a complete jerk and then is like but I love you. I tell him that if he did he would act like it and remind him of all the things I have told him over the years that would show me his love. I still rarely see any of them.

Just reminding myself again how thankful that I am to have my two little miracles, they are the best thing that ever happened to me and make my life worth living.