this morning's RE appointment

Ok, well first off, I am on a low dosage of meds to begin with. We and the doctor decided to take a different approach this time to maybe get fewer but better quality eggs, since they always start me off high and then have to back off because my estrogen goes sky high. So Friday after my first follicle check and blood work since beginning the meds on Tuesday, they lowered my meds which concerned me. My next appointment after that was this morning, so it was a long wait. Then yesterday I had egg white cm (sorry if TMI), so I freaked. Then I thought about it and told myself, my follicles were like 10 on Friday, there would be no way that I would be ready to ovulate before they could give me meds to stop it. And that maybe I just had the cm because of the meds in the first place and that my body was not really getting ready to ovulate.

This morning's RE appointment was not really that good but surprisingly, I am feeling ok about everything. Anxious, nervous and excited but ok. I am trying not to worry and trust in them and in God and know that everything will happen the way it is suppose to and that I am being well taken care of, but as everyone knows, that is not always easy.

I go in for the sono and the bitchy ultrasound tech comes in alone. So not only does she not share anything with me and explain, she does not have to say it out loud to someone else so they can write it in my chart since she is doing that herself. I kind of could tell from the screen what was happening but it was just annoying. Then they go to take my blood and I don't always have very cooperative veins, and then of course there is tons of scar tissue for years of this crap, so I don't totally blame the nurses. But they stuck me and had trouble getting the blood to flow, so then it went for a bit and then stopped. So she called the other one over and I don't look when they are taking blood but they were both doing crap to my arm and finally got the blood to flow. It was not fun. Then, I go in to see the doctor and it was the bitchy nurse practitioner. She wasn't too bad today but just on top of the other stuff it would have been better if it wasn't her. So I asked her about my follicles. I had only like 6 or 7. I know it could be better than the other times, they could be better quality (not that my eggs were bad but the embryos were not great after day 3) but it is just scary since I have always had like 15 follicles. They were ranging from sizes 12-17.5. We might lose the 17.5 waiting for the others. I was not happy about that either, damn lead follicle. Then she was going through everything to make sure we were set for the retrieval to be this weekend (which was good I guess, just incase) and she tells me that D needs a semen analysis even after I specifically asked Dr S 3 times over a month ago and he told me no. So now D needs to get it done tomorrow, he was not happy about it but oh well. I was kind of upset about the whole morning when I called so in a way (even though I didn't plan it) it worked out in my favor because he didn't give me a hard time about the sample donation tomorrow. I guess he saw all that I had to endure and figured it was the least he could do. And then I had to have one of the nurses give me my Ganarelix shot ( I brought it with me, good thinking on my part) so that I don't ovulate on my own. I will be getting one of those every morning now too when I go in. And that shot was not that painful but when it was done it burned and hurt like a bitch.

So let's just say my morning from 7-7:30 was not fun. But as I said before, I am trying my best to have trust in the doctors and God. I am doing ok now, I really am. Much better than I would have been in the past I think. Ok, I guess I should go get some work done. I will post again later when I get the call with my instructions for tonight.